Short Story

Dream Merchants

S. BALWANT

This time when Kabir, left Moscow for India, he was very disturbed. So much had charged. Nadia had just seen him off inside the Airport. Before parting she emeraced with and kissed his cheeks and while leaving she had an unusual sadness in her eyes ‘Kabir realized this sadness had nothing to do with their being man and women but being good friends. 

Kabir had a number of friends in Russia. Times had changed for the worse but let that be, it is only at such difficult times that one must find out about one’s friends. At times he wished he could fly reather than. In India are used to get news about Russia. Ever since Russia disintegrated on would hear any the worsering condition of the people there. Some Indians who had gone there an business returned terrified of the Mafia there. The entent of had news of such that the television had carrier visuals at sung being fired at the Parliament had been shown a few times already. 

A leading such news he would set scored. ‘God knows what will hopper” he thought to himself. He wared not go to Russia. He had head members of the Mafia come into one’s lodging and role are of all the posessians. There was an unprecendented spult in crime. No body knew who had joined whom. This time while going to England he did feel like applying for the Russia Visa but they charged his mind. When he called Nadia from border over the phone, she insisted that he must come to Moscow. He agreed after prouling Russian visa from London. He called Nadia again. She told him that she will meet him at the Airport. She also told him that she did not have a car, therefore she will have to get a car to drop him, wherever he wished. Nadia also expressed a wish that instead of a hotel Kabir should stay in Nadia’s mother’s apartment and the money saved from the hotel En hence may be gifted to her mother. Kabir liked in the idea. He felt staying Nadia’s mother’s apartment would be better them in a guest house. He would also have some company and would be easier to meet Nadia. Last time when he visited Moscow for a day Nadia had taken him to her mother’s house. Earlier Kabir used to visit Soviet Union often, Nadia had also new to India once. She was proud of being a student of Hindi and her mother dreamt of making her a complete Indian. She made Nadia learn Bharat Natyam. (South Indian Classical dance) and also equipped her with vital information but Indian articles, historians and film makers. 

When she graduated from Moscow University she had a dream of being a love with Indian civilization, a dream of having a touch with Indian culture, a dream of wandering in India and this very dream took her to India once and after a ten day’s sojourn between home only partly quented was planning to go again to India. But in no time Soviet Union became Russian Federation. International Policies charged. Institutions propogating India languages either closed down completely or had changed immersely. All her dreams were shattered overnight.

At that time the mother and daughter lived by themselves. As the male dominance increased Nadia got married and went away to live with her husband. After sheathing to Nadia from London, he sat thinking, “ so much her changed that it Nadia had also changed? May be she herself was part of the Mafia and may inform Mafia about Kabir’s members enter the houses and not people.” Many people in London also gave him similar news. He had also heard about many Londoners being rolled as a visit to Russia. He was pretty upset and thought he should not unnecessarily get into this mess. There were still three more days to go. He tried to look himself a seat directly to Delhi but unfortunately two out of three days there was no direct flight to Delhi. He had to stay in Moscow. 

He spent two days and two nights in this side and eventually, before leaving he left beward not expensive things in London any with the remaining money he bought some travellers cheques and cash and boarded a flight for Moscow. 

Nadia was waiting for him at the Airport. They met each other with wanted hiled a car and left. As the car was nearing the town, Kabir was looking at everyone with a culture fear and suspicion. Finally they reached home after a while Nadia’s mother also arrived. She was accompanied by Nadia’s future. Kabir was terrified He thought to himself, “definitely he is a Mafia member” last time this when Kabir visited this character was not there. Even then he participated in thrill conversation Nadia’s move around him about his meal and got busy arranging. 

Nadia’s father, Nadia and Kabir were sitting in a room. Nadia’s father was a tall and well-built person. After a while he went into the over room Kabir got an opportunity to enquire Nadia about him. Nadia informed him that her mother land re-married. He was still over come with fear. He was worried that they very cause some mischief when he was asleep. 

A short while after, Mr. Valera came to Kabir and offered him a cigarette Kabir’s declining the offer, he went and to the balcony to smoke. Kabir and Nadia were inside. Nadia’s father invited Kabir to watch the street scene from the balcony. A cold breeze was becoming when he came out to the balcony and Nadia also followed him suit he was terrified. This flat was on the seventh floor and when he watched the traffic go by in the street, he was so scared that he immediately went back into the room. He suddenly reach there he had a bottle of Scotch that he had bought at the Duty-free shop at his Airport. He asked Nadia if it would be on there he presented that bottle to her father. She was pleased. At the sight of this bottle of Scotch, Mr. Valera went into a deep thought and then suddenly his eyes were aglow with a cultaic brightness. He was realy happy and was swaging with that feeling of being happy. The food was enjoyed the scotch bottle was decy opened. Nadia’s mother and Nadia took a glass of wine each which they had procured due to Kabir’s visit. Mr. Valera and Kabir alternated between Scotch and Vodka and other reach to arts to each other. Mr. Valera commenter that Kabir’s laughter was more like the laughter of a passion and he hugged. Kabir a send times in that state of unidety they were taking to each other and Nadia schred as an Itel factor. At the dinning table they talked about the poverty the muggings role of Mafia, politics and many other things. Eventually Kabir’s fear sub dued. By the time they finished their meal, it was his dnight.  As Nadia left for her home, her parents walked her to the hearest Metro Static. They informed Kabir that those days it was dangerous to let her go all by herself. An unscotch girl could not go and by herself. There of they wanted see let the he again suspected, “may be these is trich now. They wont be giving and as a pretense and Mafia may come and over him. But thinks dent his conservation with them over the discard helped him overcome this thought. He bolted his room from cycle and lied down. 

 When he woke up in the morning there was a call from Nadia. She infulred him that she had bought tickets for a ballet performance that evening. And then she herself came over. In the mean while, Kabir was making efforts to leab some Russian from Nadia’s mother. Nadia’s father kept pouring vodka and proposing toasts. An Nadia’s arrival, they left for the dountain. It was the road that took me from the Airport to dountown. They had taken the same road yesterday but today he was not scored of everyone around him. 

Using Metro they went to see Kreuolin. Nadia showed whom all the churches these. She kept an telling him the history, furnishing details of paintings adding the Churchil. She also tone Kabir to the Church which was the official church of the Tsar before the Revolution and to the are which was now the official Church. Then they came to the red square and passed by the herein’s mansloleum. Nadia informed his that Nadia’s body is still lying there. All stores, usans libralives are still the same some of the one mercely changed their names and some stoles had started carrying goods of different variety. Kabir used to stay in Hotel Russia, Nadia told him that it was running life abode. Poverty had increased. Factories had closed down for want of walking capital. Those who had the means gone into business and with the helps of Mafia were thining. Comran man badly get enough work to make the two ends meet. Rouble had devalued sustaintially. An America dollar could for fetch some and half to give thousand Roubles officially and a lot more in the blad market. 

 Illegal business were an the upshing. Supplying of gives for the tourists was an encl. increasing business. Those who were in this business had to pay the Mafia and could conduct there ‘business’ without any obstacles. This business existed collier also but not on this gigantric scale. Even school gives of hereby fifteen sixteen years were also invalved. They world come into the trade for luxury but now it was barely enough for their survival. Moscow state greater with aten in Kremlin was showing. “Swan Lake” with music composed by Terankorsky. The hall was packed to the business. He was amazed. Nadia had prounsed tickets for two good scats. Nadia related him in detail the story of the Ballot and when the show started she kept on esplaning. The ballot had drama from dances of various countries and there was such a sequence being performance she wanted tell him about the origin of that dance “Thats’s the dance from Nepal. This we is French and now things is Geolgia” one elaborated the story was that of a prince who fells in love with  a woman dancing as  a sea shore. That girl was under the shell of a magician. Whenever the Prince and the girl met the magician with the help of his craft, osperated them. Bothe of them were pinning for each other. Prince at times desperately went to his mother to scalf help and at other he wonders go fight it and himself. They were desperate to be with each other. Being helpless alterately wept and prayed to God for help and finally prince manages to chop off  magician’s wings and wite with his beloved. Both of them dance with Joy they glide Skyards and then land on the earth. 

Nadia would get emotional duenig the show and rested her head an his broad shoulders. Kabir loved her gloming  hair and winsome smile they clasped each other’s hands-passionately. 

 Boyo and gives participating in the ballot looked like dolls made out of rubber due to the elegance and elasticity in their bodies. Whenever a romantic musical score was played Nadia would open her arms. She explained later on that by doing this one prayed to God for emhensement of Romance in one’s life through much music. She said to Kabir, “I was praying to God that the music sherpans my romantic desire”. While saying this she placed her lead an Kabir’s shoulders. Her long hair touching Kabir’s shoulders flew down to her lips. Kabir felt a strange sensation and kissed Nadia. 

During this visit it was first time that they kissed each other. Both of them sat glued to each other through the duration of the ballot. At times they clasped each other’s hands and at other they kissed. 

After the Ballot they just walked around they held each other his alums unaware of their surroundings and kept talking about Russia or India. They reached the bridge of this famous rivers in Moscow. Behind Hotel Russia if one looked at the sky from this bridge one felt one could touch the sky and God was so near. It was the some bridge whole they had met for the first five twelve years ago. Nadia was at that time studying for her university degree and  also liked to work part time for a little pocket money. She was a good enough translator for him when Kabir visited Soviet Union for the first time twelve years ago she was assigned as an interpreter to him. Nadia was undoubtedly good interpreter and she also had a desire to leader a lot about India. She was happy to work with Kabir. In her spare moments she invariably talked about India. What kind of a country is it? What kind of people? What are their ways? Their literature, their art and God knows what all. She wanted to know all. Their friendship grew into intimacy when Kabir wanted Nadia to take him around in Moscow, she asked him, “where do you want to go?” “Where ever you take me”. Kabir replied in banter. They named the area where Nadia took him, as ‘Lover’s street. Later that night they came to this bridge on the river. They were standing in a passionate embrace under at open sky when it was pouring heavily. Kabir and Nadia shouted at the tip of their vaces in ecstasy, “oh God, there is no end to your compassion. This country of a globians page of its history, the Red Square ‘are like realization of one life-time dreams. Standing on the bridge of this mighty river we how in humility for your grace of the heaveys showers are your blessings. We bow to you oh Almighty, we bow in all over humility. They must have come to this bridge any number times after that but every time they came, it definitely vained. And today once again they were the adding towards the same bridge. They reached the same spot but strangely this time it did not gain. Probably a lot had changed there. Next day Kabir met his other friends. He went to Moscow University, went for dinner to a friend’s house who was a professor. He was conversing with this professor friend’s wife. She was pretty upset at the state of thing in Russia and told Kabir bluntly, “first it is Russia but then it is India’s them. These traders are likely to reach you soon. We are suffering but you must take case of yourselves.” Kabir laughed super ficially and thought to himself, “poor thing, she does not know what we are going through”. But he was terrified of a worse future for the country. Kabir’s professor friend wanted him to stay overnight but Kabir deserted to get bad to Nadia, the professor drove him each. Nadia and her mother were waiting for him. Mr. Valera had gone and to fetch Vodka and as he returned they get down for these dinner. Many to arts were proposed and many suggestions were put forward. Earlier all such toasts were in the name of the state but this time all of these were in the name of God. He is the owner of it all, he is the guardian of we all. Nadia was complaining that political jugglers always created problems but lately, during the last two leaderships, things had changed cummensely. It was like a nightmare. Even earlier people used to talk of freedom but no one could visualise a freedom where making two ends meet was also difficult. Even if Nadia did not mention, it was obvious that whatever was there a the dinning table was due to Kabir’s visit otherwise such a meal was merely a dream for them. Talking about earlier times she wanted turn sad. Nadia’s mother was relating her own tales. She mentioned that when Nadia was born, Russia and India had very close relations. The two peoples loved each other and it was there that she had decided that she would educate Nadia about India. She studied Hindi upto M.A. and was preparing to do a doctorate when due to a sudden political storm, everything changed. 

Now she had started going to Church, believing in God and her faith in God had increased. Proudly there were millions of others in that land whose dreams were similarly crushed. When Kabir suggested her to go and settle down in India, Nadia reasoned that her fore father’s were buried in that land, they light cordless on their graves. How can they do that if they were to settle in India or anywhere else. Doing a thing would be like turning one’s back from one’s ancestrals. It would be a treadery. She became sentimental for a while there was silence in the room. 

Realizing the sensitivity of the occosia Mr. Valera broke into a Russian song. He was so involved in singing that he did not love like as different Mr. Valera than the one he had met yesterday. Yesterday he mistook him for someone connected with Mafia but today’s Mr. Valera was a sentimental being. All of them joined Mr. Valera in singing and started dancing thereafter. 

Perhaps it was after a long time that they had such an opportunity they were, therefore, sentimental as well as happy. When they were tired, Nadia’s partents went to their bedroom. Now it was only Nadia and Kabir in that room. Kabir asked her “Are they not going to see you off today?” “No I am spending the night here-with you”. said Nadia without any emotion. Kabir did not say anything but kissed her. Both of them settled down in the couch, looking at each other they were trying to asess each other at times kissing. It went on for a while. Kabir’s had travelled all over her body. He unbuttoned her blouse. Nadia took off her clothes and started undressing him. Lying naked they were kissing each other for a long time. Suddenly Nadia broke the silence and said, “If I were not to sleep here to night, how would you feel?” “Shut up! Is this the time to talking like this? Today we must make up for the time we did not see each other.” He tightened his hold on her, “I did expect that we shall be together here and if you didn’t, I’ll be disappointed”. Kabir told her his views “but I shall go down in my own esteem. I shall not be able to respect myself anymore. I am proud of one love for each other. Even my husband knows about it. We also knows that at this time, I am with you but if I slept with you I share not be able to face him my self esteem will be cannot low and yet of see you disappointed. Perhaps I feel fulfilled when I am close to you. I never feel that you are an outsider saying she started kissing Kabir-showeling kisses all over his forehead, cheeks, lips, she broke down. Nadia held Kabir tightly but he had tweved absolutely cold. He was quiet for a while. Nadia kept looking at him. Suddenly Kabir asked her to take core of her disheavelled hair so that he could see her off at the Metro Station. 

Perhaps Nadia did not expect this out of Kabir and now that Kabir had said so she felt as if a major load had been taken off his chest. They held each other in arms, kissed and left for the Metro Station. Seated in the train. Nadia kept waving at him till the end and Kabir kept looking at her. When she was out of right Kabir started walking back to the apartment of Nadia’s mother. It was the same road which he was scared to traverse the first day he had landed here. But today he was not scored of anyone. He smiled at everyone he passed and kept walking. Reaching the apartment he bolted his room and went on to sleep. 

As he woke up in the morning there was a call from Nadia. Her mother was surprised that Nadia had not spent the last night there, “Dill she walk alone to the Metro Station, probably she was asking such questions over the phone. He did not know what Nadia told her but after the telephonic conversation between the mother and daughter, the mother did not talk to Kabir. She kept an thinking. 

When Nadia came her eyes had a brilliance and her face a self-confidence. They went out so do they were discussing religion, thought and the basis of human relation. From some Metro Station they rode Metro to Gorky Park. Set down holding each other’s hands. As they drew closer, they kissed each other. She warmt of their bodies unsettled them. Kabir felt like telling her that they had taken a wrong decision last night-that they were only human beings. That having come that get they could not meet. But he did not have enough courage to say so. Later on he felt it was very mean of him. Nadia loved him truly. She was ready for everything but had spoken at her mind and both of them had taken a consciens decision of not sleeping with each other. 

Today Nadia looked more beautiful to him them end before. Perhaps he was looking at her with a lot more pride core. Nadia kept listening to his words of praise for her and thanked him. Perhaps she was aware of her beauty. She was happy about it without being vain. They talked into midnight. She was suddenly panidey wanted to rush love. She cancelled up her mother who was equally panicky. She came to fetch Kabir from the Metro Station and Nadia took another train home. 

On their way ball Nadia’s mother was asking Kabir about what they did that day. Perhaps she had already asked Nadia also and was trying to reconfirm from Kabir’s she also asked him, “Why did Nadia go back last night?” Kabir verified, it is something personal. I shall explain in detail. “The hell you will explain in detail. I did not want to push my daughter in this trade but I was aware of your relations and thought that it you continue these relations and visited us a few times in a year, my family would have managed to servive but how the hell wared that happen. You have no purpose? How you can love her in your dreams. Why would you bother to come? It looks that the fire in our heartles is also dying out. “She burst into tears. Kabir consoled her with kind words. On reaching the apartment Kabir cored not sleep that night. He had sheen a number of times to their country. He had seen this country at the pinnacle of success. The whole world respected its greetings, no economic political decisions in the world could be taken without this country’s approval. He felt disintegration of Soviet Union affected India the most, But no, these people, who sang peons to freedom are such slaves.”

Kabir was irritated. He felt like cutting off the wings of these traders and them he realized he was no Prince. Lost in thoughts, Kabir decided that whatever cost travellers degrees and other gifts he was carrying he will leave quietly his room like he use to do before going to sleep every night. He decided to write and the travellers degrees in Nadira’s name and took a little cash for his love world damling and give the balance to Nadia’s mother. Before Nadia arrived in the morning he had  accompalished all he wanted to he arranged everything in a manner that it could be detented any after his car to ferry Kabir to the airport. 

He hugged Nadia’s parents and took their leave. He gave a few dollors to Nadia’s mother and her eyes expressed her gratitude and blessings. At the Airport Nadia and Kabir sat close to each other. After the customs clock Nadia managed to accompany with to the inner counters. After checking she embraced Kabir she was trembling. Who knows it was due to their parting or some unfulfilled degree.  Nadia had a long way to go. She was alone Kabir asked her to leave. They kept a waiving at each other till she vanished from his right. Aboard the air craft he was very disturbed. Everything had changed. He remembered a joke related by Nadia. It was said that these days when people met each other in Russia the first question was about each other’s welfare. The second question was, “How are you eating these days?” The answer, “Its O.K. we manage to eat thrice”. “Really? Are you that well off that you can eat thrice a week”. Remembering this joke instead of laughing he cried. 

— translated by Ms Subramanian